| The gender gap...nature or nurture. |
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Why do our little girls tend to gravitate towards dolls and playing mother and our little boys towards building blocks and road mats? Is it nature or nurture when it comes to how the sexes behave as very young children? Alison Stoker looks at some of the latest and most controversial research. Picture the scene, having just fallen off her new bike because a stabilizer has come loose your little one approaches you and your partner wailing, with grazed knees, a cut hand and despite the tiniest drop of blood a face as white as a sheet. One of you whisks her up into your arms and hurriedly dabs at the grazed knee with some TCP, at the same time placating her with a chocolate biscuit and words of consolation. The other is outside, hands on hips surveying the scene of the accident and in minutes on their hands and knees determined to get to the route cause. They will then be found methodically removing the remaining stabilizer then re-attaching them both and tirelessly test running the vehicle in question until entirely satisfied that the stabilizers have made their last attempt at freedom. Call me sexist but the picture in my head is of a mother consoling her child while Daddy fixes the bicycle. This is not to say that when the scene calms down Mum isn't outside scrutinizing the offending mode of transport or Dad won't be found cuddling a shaken up tot. According to a recent study the way our children and we react, depends not entirely upon our sex but whether we have an E-type (female) or an S-type (male) brain. This, according to Simon Baron-Cohen Professor of Developmental Psychopathology at the University of Cambridge and author of The Essential Difference: The Truth About the Male and Female Brain is because, ‘the female brain is predominantly hard-wired for empathy. The male brain is predominantly hard-wired for understanding and building systems.’ This said a male could have a 'female' brain and vice versa, hence why little girls become tomboys and some little boys are as communicative and sensitive as their female peers. However, what the research found was that the majority of E-type brains reside in females and the majority of S-type brains in males. If nature has found the upper hand over nurture in this case male and female-brained children are different from birth. So, it’s no coincidence that baby girls tend to communicate both orally and visually before their male equivalent? Baron-Cohen suggests that this is because E-type (female) brains have a high empathizing quotient so are able to identify and respond appropriately to others' emotions and thoughts. These 'Empathizers' are better at reading facial expressions, body language, tone of voice and even judging character from a young age. A child with a female (E-type) brain, regardless of their gender, is far more likely to talk about how he/she is feeling as well as pre-empt and understand the feelings of those around them. For example they will help the new child in class to join in a game at break time or discuss a situation that he/she is struggling with at school effortlessly and openly. At the other end of the spectrum the theory supports that an S-type (male) brain has a high systemizing quotient and will be watching, working out and trying to understand some sort of pattern of regularity in the world around them from a young age. For example, they are far more likely to be mesmerized by a mobile hanging in their cot than by the adoring faces looking down at them. As they mature he or she will methodically take things apart, put them back together and make creations of their own based upon the knowledge gleaned from their experiments. Put in a social situation an S-type is more likely to take over a playground game and try and control it. And when confronted with a situation that displeases them they will first try and change it and if that fails walk away or do the best they can to avoid it or shut it out rather than negotiate or discuss it. Communication is more functionary for an S-type. A speculative example of an extreme S-type is Albert Einstein who it is believed uttered his first words at the extremely late age of 3 years old. They were, allegedly, simply 'My soup is cold'. When asked why he had never spoken up until then he simply answered that it hadn't been necessary. The world famous physicist was also known to have shown no interest in subjects at school that bored him and would intensely and tirelessly focus on those of interest with unusual fervor; he is also known to have thrown spectacular tantrums as a child when things didn't go his way. Tantrums then, if this theory is to believed, is less to do with parenting and more to do with a child's ability to communicate their upset. This would explain why two siblings brought up equally will react dramatically differently under pressure. Whereas one sibling with a higher empathizing quotient may be able to tell you exactly what has upset them another will revert to screaming and shouting incoherently because they feel unable to put their point across. Naturally few S-types wait quite so long to communicate, and show as an extreme level of single-mindedness or temper. The theory indicates that these traits are not an indication of lack of intelligence, or incompetent parenting, but rather a result of the sort of brain your little one is carrying around. Much rarer than either the ‘male’ or ‘female’ brains is the B-type or balanced brain. The balanced brain can systemize and empathize equally well. A child with a B-type brain may, for example, be happy to invite a new member into their game or social circle with conditions such as they play with a certain toy only. They may also exhibit their half E-type traits by communicating what they are thinking or feeling accurately but perhaps by forcefully butting in on a conversation or talking over a fellow class member leaning towards S-type determination. The research, though compelling does little to break traditional gender stereotypes. It’s just as insulting to suggest that boys and men lack emotional intelligence as it is to say that most women flounder when faced with systemizing – let’s take multi-tasking as just one example of our abilities. However, observing how a mixed gender group of children interacts does create a good case for at least some of this theory, even if only its social aspects. Put a group of infants into a room full of toys and whereas boys tend to make a beeline towards something they want to play with their female counterparts will often take their time deciding. Having surveyed the room the little girls are more likely to consider what other children in the group are doing and go over to them and start playing along or making up a game for everyone to join in. Girls of infant age are far more likely to seek friends to play with than boys who will happily play alone. When it comes to conflict within a group boys are quicker to push, shove, punch and hit using direct aggression whereas girls, even from a young age, will give looks to, whisper and gossip about or exclude those they are trying to intimidate mimicking what they have learnt to be more socially acceptable behaviour. As far as a child’s development is concerned what do these findings mean? This is where the theory has received its greatest amount of criticism. Is it a foregone conclusion that a child with an E-type brain will never be suited to a technical profession and another with an S-type brain will be hopeless at communicating and struggle to understand people? The theory is eager to stress that every child is an individual and that neither of the brains can be considered superior but simply different and likely to show dissimilar preferences. As parents the best thing we can do is leave options open for our children to gravitate towards whatever interests them, and if we can understand what that might be we can understand them, and hopefully ourselves, a little better. More information for you- Read The Essential Difference: The Truth About the Male and Female Brain, S. Baron-Cohen, Penguin Books, ISBN: 0141011017. For the kids- |